why should i even bother writing, i know how i feel...
most of the time.
and i know what i do. when its happening.
sometimes i dont remember the next day.

but do people really need to read about other peoples lives?
does it excite them that much?

its like if i said.
hey i got laid three days ago.
and three days be for that.
we do all S&M, im always sub.
do people get off to that?

or how bout, i got high for three weeks straight.
im such a stoner. and my parents dont care.
do people envy the way my parents dont care?

of course all of that is false.
i havent smoked weed, or done drugs since june 30th or the 31st.
and i havnt drank in about a month.
im craving alcohol though.
oh well.

so will and i are completely done.
then i met baxter.
him and i lasted maybe a month.
and now we are done.
and then richey called me.
maybe something will happen with that
but maybe, he will call me.
and maybe somethine will happen with that.
because thats what i really want.
and i know i cant have it.

which is indeed a shitty feeling

so for the first time in the history of me and elliot.
we met up and had a civilized conversation, and spoke about our feelings,
and madeup.
we left that night on a good note and today too.
thats a great feeling.
i feel mature.
we also managed to smoke a pack of cciggerettes in an hour and ahalf.
definaltly less then that.
i chain smoke, badly.

i havent seen anybody in so long.
i hope i see richey on thursday.
that would make my summer.
him and katelyn rock my socks.

so i might be going to cali twice this year,
once with shaa and once to see my cousin,
im going to the killers concert sept 30th,
and hopefully msi if steve wants to go.
im going to vermont columbus day,
and maine probably the week after.
spring break im going to florida, and then going on a cruise.
this year will indeed be awesome.
i cant wait to do well in school, and see all my friends again.

i love them.

i pierced my third holes the other night.
no pain. and they look decent.
im getting my second cartilage soon,
and hopefully my industrial.
which is going to hurt >_<

i can home from florida two days ago.
i saw lauriin whitey pete joey eddy and stelle.
then i saw hannah shaa matt and elliot yesterday
and hopefully tiff tonight.
and then apparently travis is coming here tomarrow
so i can see him tomarrow night, and chill with him and elliot.
and get crunk nucca =D. ha.

max and pete are leaving soon.
im going to cry.
now there is no reason for mike and i to end up in the same place.
i know once max leaves. i wont see him again.

oh, saturdya night max and i drove around.
we went to exit 42 on the highway and drove around there.
got lost, but managed to get home.

icant wait to go shopping, you have no idea.
i cant wait to go to TJ Max and get a pair of Sevens.
caitlin will be so proud.

i dont want to write anymore.
i hope this satisfied anyone who reads this

love always
nicky marie.*